Alpha Male Manly Lectures: The Top 5 Inventions From Automotive That Never Made It To The Power Chair Market...

I am a poet, and so my job here is to teach, as well as to entertain. That's a thought molecule that was muttered often during the European Renaissance, and it's one that still makes sense...so I will try my very best.

During a process in which I had been collecting raw materials off of my powered wheelchair, there were a few quirks that I had wished to leave off of my "parts list." However, the more that I tested and looked into it, the more that I found that what I thought was luxury was actually necessity.

In one shot, consequently, I've decided to not only throw-together a list of items that I think should be incorporated into the power chair market, but I think it's appropriate, at this point, to boil this list down. It's equally important to synthesize, or break-down just how each part/accessory would work to improve the powered wheelchair platform, and all the way across the board.

Retractable Roof/Hardtop:

This is all going to kind of tie-together as it unfolds, but a retractable roof or hardtop, for me, does a lot more than just add a certain "style sense" to the vehicle. As a consumer, I can't ever truly promise that people with disabilities will never go out into the sleet or snow. In all sincerity, it just happens, and what solution is there when the challenged commuter needs to protect his/herself from nature?!

Waterproof Electronics:

Why is it that Tesla Motors has been smart enough, clever enough to build an airtight space frame around the "Model S," and yet from the 1980s continuing into my college years, the early-2000 era, all too many a powered wheelchair has gone "Exorcist" in the rain?!

Speaking of, let's talk about the early era of wheelchair motoring, for me and a lot of my generation, the early 1990s. Remember the old, Sicilian grandmother from Golden Girls? Here we go: Southern California...1992! It was 101 degrees in Northridge, You Can't Do That On Television was beaming on Nickelodeon from Canada, and I was on my way to elementary school!

Oops, it starts raining, and not only raining kids, but pouring, as "El Nino" had manifested more than once in the West Coast vocabulary. All-in-all, chair shorts out, starts driving itself...nearly runs itself off of a curb, en route to the bowling alley, grade school...wherever! So yeah, light-up sneakers and pogs may have been cool growing-up, but airtight accessories on the power chair would have just been downright functional!

Bumpers:

Yeah, I'm talking from front-to-rear! Not only that, but with certainty, because when you look at all of the scratches/scuff marks that I've accumulated, not only on my Permobil but on any power chair, it just resonates a pattern that's continuing, and it shouldn't be!

Undercarriage guard plates:

Again, how silly is it that anyone should have to spell this out online?! Just like with front-to-rear bumpers, you're not bolting stuff like that on to a power chair to look good but to function!

I don't care if I get laid in my power wheelchair; even the insurance providers will tell you that Permobils and others are built strictly for mobility purposes! So what does a guard plate achieve? In one sentence, take a plate made out of sheet metal, diamond plate or whatever, and stick that object on to the bottom, or "undercarriage," of a wheelchair. First, it keeps natural elements, like rocks and gravel, from slipping into the chair's running gear.

Also, like the front-to-rear bumpers mentioned before, having guard plates bolted underneath the wheelchair's frame adds a sense of structural rigidity to that frame. So I agree with this whole "safe mobility" concept that me, along with an engineer friend, had recently discussed in Reno, Nevada: It's not important to go fast and be a manwhore, but it's absolutely necessary to sustain and be a gentleman!

Onboard navigation/GPS:

Um...yeah! I don't know what to tell everyone, but we're living in a "smart phone" era! That means that the Web dictates a lot of things that we do today, but it also means that our devices that were separated, 10-15 years ago, have now become very much integrated into one piece!

GPS, especially when it's onboard, is one of Western Society's most useful gadgets. And I don't necessarily think that it's a "disabled" thing, but for myself, I have a terrible sense of freakin' direction, and I've heard my dad make the same complaint in the past!

Here's what it boils-down to: Permobil and other premium power wheelchairs feature extension arms and similar accessories that bolt on to the vehicle's main drive console. Within that small space frame, bolt on a smart phone or tablet with GPS, a GPS device by itself or both!